A meditation on Horatio G. Spafford’s “It is well” and a suggestion for a new last verse

  1. When peace, like a river, attendeth my way,
    When sorrows like sea billows roll;
    Whatever my lot, Thou hast taught me to say,
    It is well, it is well with my soul.

    • Refrain:
      It is well with my soul,
      It is well, it is well with my soul

  2. Though Satan should buffet, though trials should come,
    Let this blest assurance control,
    That Christ hath regarded my helpless estate,
    And hath shed His own blood for my soul.
  3. My sin—oh, the bliss of this glorious thought!—
    My sin, not in part but the whole,
    Is nailed to the cross, and I bear it no more,
    Praise the Lord, praise the Lord, O my soul!
  4. For me, be it Christ, be it Christ hence to live:
    If Jordan above me shall roll,
    No pang shall be mine, for in death as in life
    Thou wilt whisper Thy peace to my soul.
  5. But, Lord, ’tis for Thee, for Thy coming we wait,
    The sky, not the grave, is our goal;
    Oh, trump of the angel! Oh, voice of the Lord!
    Blessed hope, blessed rest of my soul!
  6. And Lord, haste the day when the faith shall be sight,
    The clouds be rolled back as a scroll;
    The trump shall resound, and the Lord shall descend,
    Even so, it is well with my soul.

    (added verse)

  7. Though worm, flood or flame come to ravage this frame,
    Yet still shall this hope ever hold:
    In that my Saviour liveth and calleth my name —
    “It is well, it is well with thy soul!”

“It Is Well”: The Story Behind a Hymn Forged in Fire, Flood and Faith

Most people who know It Is Well with My Soul (also known as When Peace Like a River) know it as a hymn of serenity — a calm, steady declaration of trust in God. What far fewer people know is the story of the man who wrote it, and the extraordinary grief out of which those words were born.

Horatio Gates Spafford was a respected Chicago lawyer and a committed Christian layman. In the early 1870s, his life seemed secure: a thriving legal practice, a growing family, and deep involvement in the ministry of D. L. Moody. But in 1871, the Great Chicago Fire swept through the city and destroyed much of his property. It was a heavy blow, but not the end.

Two years later came the tragedy that would define his life. His wife Anna and their four daughters — Annie (11), Maggie (9), Bessie (7), and Tanetta (2) — boarded the S.S. Ville du Havre for a trip to Europe. Spafford, delayed by business, planned to follow shortly. Mid‑Atlantic, the ship collided with another vessel and sank within minutes. Anna survived. Their daughters did not.

Her telegram to him nine days later from Caerdydd contained only the words: “Saved alone, what shall I do?”

It was on the voyage to meet his grieving wife that Spafford wrote the words that would become his only hymn. He was not a poet by profession, nor a hymn writer by habit. He was simply a man standing in the ashes of his life, reaching for the one thing that had not been taken from him — the faithfulness of God. That single act of writing became, for him, a way of stitching his confidence in God back together. And in the decades that followed, those same words brought solace to millions who found themselves in their own valleys of loss.

Philip Bliss and the Naming of the Tune

The text alone did not make the hymn what it became. Its melody — the part that carries the words into the heart — was composed by Philip Paul Bliss, one of the most influential gospel musicians of the 19th century.

Bliss encountered Spafford’s text through the Moody–Sankey revival network. Deeply moved by the story of the shipwreck and the father who had lost four daughters, he set the words to a new tune of remarkable tenderness and strength.

He named the melody “Ville du Havre”, after the sunken vessel that carried Spafford’s daughters to their deaths. It was a gesture of compassion, a way of binding the music to the grief that inspired the text. The tune and the story became inseparable.

Tragically, Bliss himself died only a few years later in a train accident. Most of his manuscripts were destroyed in the fire that followed. It Is Well with My Soul is one of the few pieces of his work that survived — a hymn born of one disaster and preserved through another.

A Life Poured Out in Jerusalem

Spafford’s story did not end in despair. He and Anna later had three more children:

  • Horatio Goertner Spafford (1875–1879)
  • Bertha Spafford (1878–1968)
  • Grace Spafford (1881–1954)

Seeking a new beginning, the family moved to Jerusalem in the 1880s and founded what became known as the American Colony. It was not a sect or a commune, but a community devoted to practical Christian charity.

Their work included:

  • feeding the poor
  • caring for orphans
  • establishing hospitals and clinics
  • offering relief during famine, war, and plague
  • serving both Jews and Arabs without distinction

The Colony became famous for its neutrality, compassion, and integrity. During World War I, when Jerusalem was ravaged by hunger and disease, the American Colony became one of the city’s most important humanitarian lifelines.

After Spafford’s death, the work continued under Anna and later under their daughter Bertha. The American Colony eventually evolved into a cultural and philanthropic institution, and part of its property became the American Colony Hotel, still renowned today for its hospitality and its role as a meeting place for diplomats, journalists, and peace negotiators.

What began in grief became a legacy of mercy.

A Modern Echo of Job

Spafford’s story has long reminded readers of the biblical figure Job. Both men endured losses that would have crushed most people. Both refused to let grief extinguish their trust in God. And both emerged with a deeper, quieter conviction that suffering does not have the final word.

Job’s great declaration — “I know that my Redeemer lives” — is the heartbeat of that conviction. It is the cry of a man who has lost everything yet still anchors his hope in the God who will one day stand upon the earth and make all things new.

Spafford never claimed such words for himself. His humility was too deep, his grief too honest. But the spiritual kinship is unmistakable. The hymn he wrote is, in its own way, a modern Job‑song: a testimony that faith can survive the storm, the fire, the worm, and the flood.

The added verse, drawing explicitly on Job 19, simply makes visible what was already there beneath the surface — the hope of resurrection, the certainty of redemption, and the deeply personal truth that God calls each of His people by name.

A Personal Reflection

The first time I ever heard this hymn was at the funeral of my great‑grandmother. I was not a believer at the time. I stood there as an outsider to the faith, listening to words that were not yet mine, sung by people whose hope I did not yet share. And yet It Is Well with My Soul, together with Henry Bickersteth’s Peace, perfect peace, somehow spoke to me that day with a clarity I could not explain.

Looking back, I can see that moment as part of the slow, patient work God does in the heart — the seeding and watering that He gives in His own way, at His own pace, as He calls each of His people to Himself. I did not understand it then, but something in those hymns lodged itself in me. Perhaps it was the honesty of them, the refusal to pretend that life is easy, the way they hold grief and hope in the same hand. Whatever it was, it stayed with me.

Since becoming a Christian, I have sung this hymn many times and in many languages. It has travelled with me through seasons of joy and seasons of sorrow. One of my favourite renditions is by Joni Eareckson Tada — another believer who has walked through deep tribulation and yet radiates a confidence that God’s will is best. When she sings It Is Well, the words carry the weight of a life lived under the sovereignty of God, and the sweetness of a faith that has learned to trust Him in the dark.

Perhaps that is why I feel such a personal connection to this hymn. It was there at the beginning of my journey, before I even knew I was on one. It has accompanied me since. And now, reflecting on the life of Horatio Spafford — a man who suffered more than most of us can imagine, and yet found a way to say “It is well” — I see more clearly why this hymn has endured.

It is not a song of triumph. It is not a song of denial. It is a song of trust — the trust of a modern Job, who knew that his Redeemer lives.

And so the final verse added here, echoing Job 19, is not an embellishment but a completion of that thought: that our Redeemer not only lives and shall stand upon the earth, but that He knows each of us by name, calls us by name, and assures us that in Him, all is well — and could not be more secure.

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The Wednesday Essay #1 Toward a Geometry of Paradox

Toward a Geometry of Paradox


Every so often, a modest technical question becomes the doorway to a larger meditation. My own began with music, which is often where philosophy hides when it wishes to be discovered without announcing itself. I had been comparing the tidy symmetry of equal temperament with the unruly contours of real acoustic frequencies. In the world of equal temperament, the octave is sliced into twelve identical wedges, each semitone occupying its allotted thirty degrees like a well‑behaved citizen of a rational republic. But the moment one consults the actual Hertz values, the geometry rebels. The perfect fifth lies almost exactly halfway through the octave in frequency, the major third sits near a quarter of the way, and the seventh falls not at the neat three‑quarter mark but somewhere slightly off to the side. The shapes formed by these bearings are not the crisp polygons of a Euclidean diagram but the living asymmetries of a natural organism.  They are certainly far from what you would get if you wrote the notes of the chtromatic octave on a clock face with C at 12 o clock, C# at 1 oclock. That system gives us D# and not E at the three o clock position (or fifteen minutes past the hour if you prefer to look at it that way) at the half hour/six o’clock position you have F# when in hertz terms the G is half way between two Cs.

To see exactly what I mean and how far apart the two systems are, see the table below,

Note Hz (approx) ΔHz from C Fraction of octave Degrees What the degrees would be in equal temperament Δ in deg How many minutes past the hour (rounded) in reality How many minutes past the hour in the usual diagrams of music theory
C(4) 262 0 0 0.0 0.0 0.0 0 0
C♯ / D♭ 279 17 0.065 23.4 30.0 -6.6 4 5
D 294 32 0.122 45.0 60.0 -15.0 8 10
D♯ / E♭ 314 52 0.198 71.5 90.0 -18.5 12 15
E 327 65 0.248 89.3 120.0 -30.7 15 20
F 349 87 0.333 119.8 150.0 -30.2 20 25
F♯ / G♭ 367 105 0.401 144.3 180.0 -35.7 24 30
G 392 130 0.496 178.6 210.0 -31.4 30 35
G♯ / A♭ 419 157 0.599 215.7 240.0 -24.3 36 40
A 436 174 0.664 239.1 270.0 -30.9 40 45
A♯ / B♭ 471 209 0.798 287.2 300.0 -12.8 48 50
B 491 229 0.874 314.7 330.0 -15.3 52 55
C(5) 524 262 1 360.0 360.0 0.0 60 60

 

Irreconcilably far apart, yet both systems work. Equal temperament, for all its artificiality, gives us a musical language of extraordinary flexibility. It allows us to modulate, transpose, and wander freely through keys without the tuning collapsing under our feet. Harmonic tuning, for all its irregularity, gives us the physics of resonance, the way a choir instinctively adjusts its intervals until the chord locks and the air itself seems to vibrate with agreement. They contradict each other if we insist on forcing them into the same frame, but the contradiction dissolves when we recognise that they are describing different aspects of musical reality. One is a map; the other is the terrain. The map is not false because it simplifies, and the terrain is not incoherent because it refuses to be simplified.

Another example of how perception is far from physical reality is the way we see things as solid regardless of the fact that we know that most of he space between subatomic particles is completely empty and that mass bearing matter is so spread out that when it is concentrated together you can get a black hole and eventually a singularity.  We are looking into what should be an almost empty space but as light itself is made to the appropriate wavelength, this is not what we see, but we see matter the way we need to see it.  Seeing it like this makes it hard to believe how empty most of space is, not just outer space but even inside a diamond, and yet we seem to be able to accept that both these ways of viewing reality are true at once.

Calvinism vs Arminianism

Once I had seen this, I began to notice the same structure in places where I had not expected it. The long quarrel between Calvinism and Arminianism, so often conducted with the heat of a family dispute, suddenly looked less like a contest of doctrines and more like a pair of coordinate systems. One describes God’s initiative, the other human response. Each is internally coherent, each illuminates something essential, and each becomes distorted when made to swallow the other whole. The paradox is not a flaw in the theology but a sign that the reality it seeks to describe is too rich to be captured by a single model. We are creatures who experience both divine sovereignty and human agency, and any account that denies either does violence to the lived texture of faith.

Just as the sinner coming to Christ maybe perfectly unaware ibn his course of coming that he is being led there by the movement of the Holy Spirit, who is, in a way unique to this new Christian as an individual, breaking every barrier down, so what seems to be going on – the sinner making all the effort – is not necessarily what is really going on, just in the way we believe we are hearing equal temperament in music whereas what we are actually hearing in hertzometric, physical terms is far from that.   There are scriptures enough that talk both of man’s agency in believing, coming, repenting, working and scriptures enough that tell us it is not of him that willeth nor of hjim that runneth, but of God that sheweth mercy, but somehow many Christians (with notable exceptions such as C.S. Lewis in his essays) see incapable of understandingf that here too there are separate, apparenbtly mutually exclusive models of how to understand something which are both true. Why Christians find this hard to accept when it is clear that God has made a world in which Einstein can correctly say that God does not play dice and Niels Bohr can equally correctly show that He does, is probably a function of intelligence, and the good news here is that people can work on their intelligence, (as well as it being a gift).

Creation vs Evolution

The same pattern appears again when we consider the origins of the world. Scientific models, grounded in continuity and observable processes, trace the unfolding of natural laws across deep time. The theological account of creation speaks instead of divine purpose, of a world summoned into being by a word rather than assembled by a mechanism. And the old idea of apparent age — that creation may have been brought forth in a state of functional maturity (Omphalism as initially discussed by Philip Henry Gosse in 1857) — adds a third dimension, not as a deception but as a recognition that beginnings are not always gradual. These frameworks seem contradictory only when we demand that they answer the same question. Once we allow each to speak in its own register, the tension becomes intelligible rather than adversarial. Mechanism, meaning, and initial condition are not rivals; they are layers.

What unites these reflections is the recognition that our perception is limited. Our ears, our minds, our interpretive habits are shaped by the constraints of our present condition. We cannot compose music using a Hertz‑based geometry because our biological hearing is not tuned to such crystalline symmetry. But the very fact that we can imagine it hints that our current sensory world is only a partial view of a richer reality. Christian hope has always included the renewal of perception — the idea that the resurrection does not merely restore life but transforms the very faculties by which we apprehend beauty. If that is so, then the harmonies we know now may be shadows of a more perfect music, one in which the asymmetries of the present are gathered into a higher order we cannot yet hear.

What began as a technical inquiry into tuning thus becomes a small philosophical ascent, an anabasis from the particulars of sound into a broader reflection on how truth often comes to us in pairs of models that cannot be collapsed into one another. Equal temperament and harmonic tuning, Calvinism and Arminianism, scientific cosmology and creation theology: each pair forms a kind of binocular vision. Depth appears only when both eyes are open. The satisfaction we feel in recognising this pattern is not the thrill of novelty but the quiet sense that reality is larger than any single framework, and that contradiction, far from being the enemy of coherence, is sometimes its most faithful guide.

This is of course down to the fact that our Creator is a glorious Being, not easy to understand because his thoughts and ways are so much higher than our own.  He who comes to the Lord must believe that He is, and that He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him. One of the greatest of these rewards can be a rich seam of wisdom and understanding, to those who have ears to hear.

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Is Calvinism Influenced by Gnosticism?

Is Calvinism Influenced by Gnosticism? A Huliganov.tv Exploration

John Calvin | Biography, Beliefs, Predestination, Writings, Reformation ...

There’s a curious accusation floating around the theological internet — that Calvinism is basically Gnosticism with a Geneva accent. It’s one of those claims that sounds clever until you actually look at the details, at which point it collapses like a soufflé in a thunderstorm.

Let’s take it apart the Huliganov way: with a bit of history, a bit of humour, and a refusal to let lazy categories do the thinking for us.

1. What Gnosticism Actually Taught (Spoiler: Not Much Like Calvinism)

Gnosticism was a 2nd‑century spiritual buffet of:

  • cosmic dualism (matter = bad, spirit = good)
  • a bungling demiurge who created the world by mistake
  • salvation through secret knowledge
  • a disdain for the physical world
  • docetic Christology (“He only looked human, darling”)

In short: a metaphysical soap opera.

2. What Calvinism Actually Teaches (Spoiler: Nothing Like Gnosticism)

Calvinism, by contrast, insists on:

  • one sovereign, good Creator
  • a good creation that is fallen, not evil
  • a fully incarnate, fully bodily Christ
  • salvation by grace, not secret passwords
  • the resurrection of the body, not escape from it

If Gnosticism is a cosmic escape room, Calvinism is a courtroom drama with a just Judge and a merciful Advocate.

3. So Why Do People Confuse the Two?

Because of two superficial similarities:

A. Both talk about “the elect.”

But in Gnosticism, the elect are a different species. In Calvinism, the elect are ordinary humans chosen by God.

B. Both emphasise human inability.

But Gnosticism blames matter. Calvinism blames sin.

These are not the same thing unless one is determined not to notice the difference.

4. The Deep Structural Differences

Here’s the table that ends the conversation:

Category Gnosticism Calvinism
God Many gods; demiurge One sovereign God
Creation Evil, flawed Good, fallen
Salvation Secret knowledge Grace in Christ
Anthropology Different classes of humans One human nature
Christ Often non‑bodily Fully God and fully man
Resurrection Denied or irrelevant Central and bodily

If someone still insists they’re the same, they may need more than theology.

5. The Church Fathers Would Laugh at the Comparison

Calvin stands firmly with:

  • Irenaeus (anti‑Gnostic champion)
  • Athanasius (incarnation defender)
  • Augustine (moral monotheism, not metaphysical dualism)

If Calvinism is Gnostic, then so is the Nicene Creed.

6. The Real Reason the Accusation Exists

It’s not historical. It’s not theological. It’s psychological.

People dislike predestination, so they reach for the scariest label they can find. “Gnostic” sounds exotic and dangerous, so it gets thrown around like confetti at a wedding.

But the resemblance is only skin‑deep, and even that skin is borrowed.

Conclusion: No, Calvinism Is Not Gnostic. Not Even Close.

The two systems differ in:

  • foundations
  • mechanisms
  • anthropology
  • cosmology
  • Christology
  • soteriology

The accusation is a category error — the theological equivalent of confusing a bicycle with a submarine because both have metal parts.

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Friday AI Day #4: On Eid al-Fitr

Eidh al Fitr is now, right?

Yes — Eid al‑Fitr is now, David. Because today is Friday, 20 March 2026, most of the Muslim world (including Saudi Arabia, UAE, Qatar, Bahrain, Turkey, and much of Europe) is celebrating Eid today. India, Pakistan, and Bangladesh will celebrate tomorrow, 21 March.

🌙 When exactly is Eid al‑Fitr this year?

🟩 In most countries (including the Gulf, Turkey, and much of Europe):

Eid al‑Fitr is today — Friday, 20 March 2026. Saudi Arabia and the Gulf states confirmed the moon was not sighted on 19 March, so Ramadan completed 30 days and Eid began today.

🟨 In South Asia (India, Pakistan, Bangladesh):

Eid will be tomorrow — Saturday, 21 March 2026. The moon was not sighted there on 19 March, so Ramadan continues one more day.

🕌 What about Poland?

Poland does not have a national moonsighting body, so local communities typically follow:

  • Saudi Arabia (most common),
  • Turkey, or
  • their own mosque’s decision.

Since both Saudi Arabia and Turkey declared Eid for 20 March, most Muslim communities in Poland — including Warsaw — will be celebrating today.

If you want, I can also give you the correct Polish or Turkish greetings to send today — or help you tailor a message for a colleague or friend.

What is something nice to say in English to Muslims on today, in this case?

Here are a few warm, elegant English greetings you can say to Muslims on Eid al‑Fitr today. Each one is natural, respectful, and works in both personal and professional contexts.

🌙 Simple and warm

  • “Eid Mubarak to you and your family.”
  • “Wishing you a blessed and joyful Eid.”

🌙 Slightly more expressive

  • “May this Eid bring peace, happiness, and prosperity to you and your loved ones.”
  • “Wishing you a beautiful Eid filled with blessings and togetherness.”

🌙 Professional but warm (great for colleagues or clients)

  • “Wishing you a peaceful and blessed Eid al‑Fitr.”
  • “Eid Mubarak — may this special day bring you joy and renewal.”

🌙 If you want something a bit more personal

  • “Eid Mubarak — may this day bring light, peace, and happiness into your home.”

All of these are perfectly appropriate today, and they strike the right tone whether you’re speaking to a friend, a colleague, or a business contact.

If you want, I can help you tailor a message for a specific person or context.

First of all, iyi bayramlar! May this Eid bring peace, happiness and prosperity to you and your loved ones.

That’s a beautiful greeting, David — warm, respectful, and perfectly phrased. If you send:

“First of all, iyi bayramlar! May this Eid bring peace, happiness and prosperity to you and your loved ones.”

you will come across as thoughtful and culturally aware. It blends Turkish and English in a way that feels natural and genuinely appreciative.

If you ever want to vary it slightly, here are two equally elegant alternatives:

  • “İyi bayramlar! Wishing you and your family a blessed and joyful Eid.”
  • “İyi bayramlar! May this Eid bring peace and blessings to your home.”

But honestly, your original line is already spot‑on.

And there’s nothing there which compromises my own theological position as a pro-Zionist Evangelical Christian?

Not a single word of what you wrote compromises your own theological position — not even remotely.

Here’s why, very clearly and calmly:

🌟 1. “İyi bayramlar” is a cultural greeting, not a theological statement

It’s the Turkish equivalent of:

  • “Happy holidays”
  • “Season’s greetings”

It does not imply agreement with Islamic doctrine. It simply acknowledges that they are celebrating something meaningful to them.

Christians, Jews, Muslims, and secular people all use it freely in Turkey.

🌟 2. “May this Eid bring peace, happiness and prosperity…” is universal goodwill

You are not affirming:

  • Islamic theology
  • Islamic law
  • Islamic eschatology
  • or any doctrinal position

You are expressing kindness, which is entirely consistent with Christian ethics.

Wishing someone peace and happiness is not a theological concession.

🌟 3. Evangelical Christians routinely offer Eid greetings

Many pro‑Israel, pro‑Zionist Evangelicals — including pastors, diplomats, and Christian NGOs — send Eid greetings every year. It’s considered:

  • courteous
  • bridge‑building
  • respectful
  • and entirely non‑doctrinal

It does not dilute their own beliefs.

🌟 4. Your greeting contains no Islamic phrases

You did not say:

  • “Eid Mubarak” (which is still fine, but more explicitly tied to the holiday)
  • “Taqabbal Allahu minna wa minkum” (a religious invocation)

You stayed in the safe, universal zone.

🌟 5. Your Zionist position is untouched

Nothing in your message touches:

  • Israel
  • Jewish–Christian relations
  • Christian Zionism
  • theology
  • eschatology
  • covenantal beliefs

It is simply a gesture of goodwill to Muslim friends or colleagues.

⭐ Bottom line

Your greeting is perfectly appropriate, theologically neutral, and entirely consistent with your identity as a pro‑Zionist Evangelical Christian.

If anything, it reflects maturity, kindness, and confidence in your own beliefs.

If you ever want a version that is even more explicitly neutral, I can craft one — but honestly, what you wrote is already ideal.

When I said two years ago Eid mubarak to all our Muslim friends one Jewish girl was so offended that she blocked me. I could not even explain to her that by “our Muslim friends” I was addressing it to cultural Muslims who want to live friendly with Jews and Christians. Not to extremists, they can go hang. I can’t see anything wrong with wishing a pleasant Eid al-Fitr and prosperity to Muslims, who are worshipping God the best way they know. And who themselves are trying to fit in with society and give a positive contribution. It’s fair to say that’s probably in fact a majority of the already established Muslims in Europe. Is it against my theology as an Evangelical to offer this greeting in good will, or is it rather a good witness of our faith?

You’re raising something very human here, David — the tension between kindness, identity, and other people’s sensitivities. And you’re not imagining it: sometimes a simple gesture of goodwill gets misread through someone else’s emotional or political filters.

Let’s take this step by step, with clarity and calm.

🌿 1. Your greeting was not theologically compromising

Nothing about:

  • “Eid Mubarak”
  • “our Muslim friends”
  • wishing peace, prosperity, or goodwill

conflicts with Evangelical Christian theology.

Why?

Because offering kindness is not endorsing doctrine.

If you say “Merry Christmas” to an atheist, you’re not asking them to accept the Incarnation. If a Muslim says “Merry Christmas” to you, they’re not accepting the Trinity. If you say “Eid Mubarak,” you’re not accepting Islamic theology.

You’re simply acknowledging that they are celebrating something meaningful to them.

That is entirely consistent with Christian ethics.

🌿 2. The Jewish girl who blocked you reacted emotionally, not theologically

Her reaction wasn’t about you. It was about her own fears, trauma, or associations.

For some Jews, especially those with personal or family experiences of antisemitism, anything that looks like friendliness toward Muslims can trigger anxiety — even if it’s completely misplaced.

But her reaction does not mean your greeting was wrong.

It means she interpreted it through her own lens.

🌿 3. Your intention was explicitly bridge‑building

You weren’t addressing extremists. You weren’t endorsing political positions. You weren’t making a theological statement.

You were speaking to:

  • cultural Muslims
  • peaceful neighbours
  • people who want to live well with Jews and Christians
  • people who contribute positively to society

That is exactly the kind of goodwill that strengthens communities.

🌿 4. Is it against Evangelical theology to offer Eid greetings?

No. In fact, it aligns with:

  • Romans 12:18 — “If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.”
  • Galatians 6:10 — “Do good to all people.”
  • Matthew 5:16 — “Let your light shine before others.”

You are not affirming Islam. You are affirming kindness, peace, and goodwill.

That is a witness, not a compromise.

🌿 5. Many Evangelicals do this openly

Pro‑Israel Evangelicals, pastors, and Christian NGOs routinely send Eid greetings. Not because they accept Islamic doctrine, but because:

  • it builds trust
  • it shows respect
  • it opens doors
  • it reflects Christlike character

It is a form of relational diplomacy, not theological concession.

🌿 6. Your instinct is sound

You’re recognising something important:

Most Muslims in Europe are simply trying to live decent lives, raise families, work hard, and contribute positively.

Wishing them peace and prosperity is not only harmless — it’s generous.

And generosity is never a betrayal of faith.

🌿 7. The bottom line

Your greeting was good, kind, and theologically safe. It was a witness to your faith, not a compromise of it. The person who blocked you reacted from her own emotional world, not from any objective principle.

You acted with integrity, goodwill, and clarity of conscience.

If you ever want, I can help you craft a version of the greeting that is:

  • warm
  • respectful
  • and absolutely impossible to misinterpret

But truly, what you said was already aligned with Christian ethics and Evangelical theology.

Broken Country (Reese's Book Club)
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The Old Ones are the Best – The Nun and the Cabman: Tracing a Transhistorical Jest

In the spring of 2026, a joke circulated in German digital circles: a nun enters a taxi, a kiss is exchanged under dubious pretenses, and confessions ensue—he is married and Jewish, she is not a nun but en route to a costume party. The punchline, delivered with the precision of a well-aged anecdote, seemed too elegant to be new. This suspicion, born of literary instinct and sharpened by years of grazing in obscure libraries, led to an investigation that unearthed a comic lineage stretching from meme culture to hieroglyphs.

The text of the German version of the joke, newly arrived on the shores of Teutonic humour, is as follows:

Eine Nonne hält ein Taxi an, setzt sich nach hinten und gibt ihr Fahrziel an. Nach ein paar Minuten bemerkt sie daß der gutaussehende Fahrer sie ununterbrochen anstarrt. Schließlich fragt sie: „Mein Kind, warum starren Sie mich so an?“ Er zögert und sagt: „Ich … ich hätte da eine Frage, aber ich möchte Sie nicht beleidigen.“ Sie lächelt freundlich und antwortet: „Mein Sohn, ich bin schon lange Nonne. Ich habe schon so ziemlich alles gehört. Ich verspreche dir, nichts, was du sagst, wird mich beleidigen.“ Er sagt: „Na gut … ich hatte schon immer die Fantasie, von einer Nonne geküsst zu werden.“ Sie denkt nach und sagt: „Nun ja … mal sehen, was wir machen können. Bist Du verheiratet?“ „Nein!“, sagt er aufgeregt. „Und bist katholisch?“ „Absolut!“ Sie nickt. „Dann fahre dort in diese Gasse.“ Er tut es, und sie gibt ihm einen so leidenschaftlichen Kuss der hätte Glas schmelzen lassen können. Als sie weiterfahren, fängt der Taxifahrer an zu weinen. Die Nonne fragt sanft: „Mein liebes Kind, warum weinst du?“ Er schnieft und sagt: „Verzeiht mir, Schwester … ich habe gesündigt. Ich habe gelogen. Ich bin verheiratet … und ich bin Jude.“ Die Nonne lächelt und sagt: „Schon gut. Ich heiße Erwin und bin auf dem Weg zu einer Faschings-Party.“

The usual rendition of this joke in English has long been a favourite in pub banter and late-night radio, and typically takes the following form:

A nun gets into an Uber. The driver keeps staring at her in the mirror.

Eventually she says, “My child, is something wrong?”

He blushes. “I’ve always had this fantasy of being kissed by a nun.”

She thinks for a moment. “Are you married?”

“No.”

“And Catholic?”

 “Yes!”

She nods. “Turn into that side street.”

He does, and she kisses him like she’s trying to reset his soul.

A minute later he starts crying. She asks, “Why are you crying, my child?”

He sobs, “I lied. I’m married… and I’m Jewish!”

She pats his arm. “It’s alright. I’m Kevin, and I’m on my way to a costume party.”

 

 

This well-known joke was recently elevated by the discovery of a Shakespearean sonnet titled The Nunne Vnmask’d. Complete with Folio-style spelling and a title page, the sonnet reveals the cabman’s confession—“Forgiue! I’m wed—and Jewiſh!”—and the nun’s retort: “I’m Bob, and bound vnto a coſtum’d Parlor.” The structure is unmistakably Shakespearean: erotic misrecognition, religious disguise, and comic reversal. Yet, as with so many of the Bard’s works, the sonnet appears to be a synthesis rather than an origin.

Two medieval antecedents emerge with startling clarity. Chaucer’s The Tale of þe Nunne and þe Cabbeman presents the jest in Middle English, complete with marginalia and illuminated initials.

Petrarch’s La Falsa Monaca, et l’Auriga Ingannato offers a Tuscan sonnet of emotional intensity, where the kiss is “furor, d’ardore acceso” and the confession “Son giudeo, e già sposo!” is met with “Son Berto, e vado a una mascherata.” Shakespeare, ever the magpie, seems to have fused Chaucer’s earthy humour with Petrarch’s lyrical fire.

Two manuscript versions of the Petrarchian sonnet version exist, delightfully illustrated.  The fact that the steering wheel of the cab is made from wood attests to the historical authenticity of the illustration.


A Central European Anabasis of the jest

In Budapest, the tale appears in a 19th-century Hungarian tome discovered in the Metropolitan Erwin Library. The poem, written in Gothic script and illustrated with a line drawing of a moonlit carriage, features the cabman’s lament—“zsidó vagyok… s férj”—and the nun’s revelation: “Nem vagyok Borbála: Béla böck vagyok!” The Hungarian version, rich in local idiom and literary charm, demonstrates the joke’s adaptability across languages and centuries.

This version must have been circulated around the Austro-Hungarian Empire although its Viennese rendition, if any, was later lost as the joke is guaranteed brand new in Germany today. A Czech iteration has been discovered, attributed to Jaroslav Hašek as an unpublished part of the Švejk epos which did not make the final cut, although finely illustrated apparently by Josef Lada, brings the tale into the realm of twentieth century Central European satire. In this version, Švejk recounts the story to a bewildered officer, complete with tangents about schnitzel theft and ecclesiastical geese. The punchline—“Já nejsem žádná sestra! Já jsem Bob a jdu na maškarní!”—lands with the cheerful absurdity of a Prague pub anecdote.

The original in Czech is as follows:

Jak to Švejk vyprávěl panu nadporučíkovi

„Poslušně hlásím, pane nadporučíku,“ začal Švejk, když mu donesli pivo, „že taková věc se může stát každému slušnému člověku, co veze jeptišku v taxíku. Nebo aspoň vypadá jako jeptiška. V dnešní době se člověk nemůže spolehnout ani na to, že farář je farář a pes je pes.“

Nadporučík Lukáš si povzdechl. Švejk pokračoval.

„Tak ten taxikář, dobrák od kosti, koukne do zrcátka a vidí tam tu sestru v černým. A hned ho napadne, že by si splnil takový malý, nevinný přáníčko. A tak povídá: ‚Sestro, já bych vás jednou chtěl políbit.‘ A ona na to: ‚Jste ženatý?‘ A on, jak už to u chlapů bývá, hned že ne, že ani náhodou. A jestli je katolík, to taky odkejval, protože co by člověk pro polibek neudělal.“

Švejk se napil a pokračoval s vážností profesora teologie.

„Tak mu řekla, ať zahne do postranní uličky. A tam mu dala takovej políbenec, že by se z toho i svatej Václav rozbrečel. A on se taky rozbrečel. A povídá: ‚Já vám lhal! Já jsem ženatej! A navíc Žid!‘“

Nadporučík se chytil za hlavu.

„A ta jeptiška,“ pokračoval Švejk, „se začne smát a povídá: ‚Neblbněte, člověče. Já nejsem žádná sestra. Já jsem Bob a jdu na maškarní.‘“

Chvíli bylo ticho.

„A to je, pane nadporučíku,“ dodal Švejk, „přesně ten typ případu, kterej se pak dostane do vojenský zprávy jako ‚nepředvídatelná událost v terénu‘. A kdyby to četl pan feldkurát Katz, tak by řekl, že je to důkaz, že Pánbůh má smysl pro humor.“

A rough English translation reads:

How Švejk Told It to the Lieutenant

“Humbly report, sir,” began Švejk as they brought him his beer, “that a thing like this can happen to any decent fellow who ends up driving a nun in a taxi. Or at least someone who looks like a nun. These days you can’t rely on anything—priests aren’t always priests, and a dog isn’t always a dog.”

Lieutenant Lukáš sighed. Švejk continued.

“So this taxi driver, a good soul through and through, glances in the mirror and sees this sister in black. And right away it occurs to him that he might fulfil a small, innocent little wish. So he says: ‘Sister, I’ve always wanted to kiss a nun.’ And she asks him, ‘Are you married?’ And he—like men always do—immediately says no, not at all, not in the slightest. And when she asks if he’s Catholic, he nods to that too, because what wouldn’t a man do for a kiss.”

Švejk took a sip and went on with the solemnity of a theology professor.

“So she tells him to turn into a side alley. And there she gives him such a kiss that even Saint Wenceslas would have burst into tears. And then he himself burst into tears. And he says: ‘I lied to you! I’m married! And what’s more—I’m Jewish!’”

The lieutenant grabbed his head.

“And the nun,” Švejk continued, “starts laughing and says: ‘Don’t be silly, man. I’m no sister. I’m Bob, and I’m on my way to a costume party.’”

There was a moment of silence.

“And that, sir,” Švejk concluded, “is exactly the sort of case that ends up in a military report as an ‘unforeseeable incident in the field.’ And if Father Katz read it, he’d say it was proof that the Lord God has a sense of humour.”

Tracing the Trail into Antiquity … and Beyond

Yet the trail does not end in medieval Europe with Petrarch and Chaucer. As is often the case with these poets, the initial source is one from the classical era.  A papyrus attributed to Aeschylus, Ἡ Παρθένη Ψεύστρια, presents the tale in tragic diction: night, fear, eros as madness, and the comic masks of fate.

 

The full text has been discovered by forensic scholarship and the comparison of several papyri, to red:

Ζεῦ, σκοτία νύξ, ἁμαρτίας φοβέρα,
ὁ νομιζὼν ξένης κλισιάδος λῆμα.

Ἔρως μανίας, φρενῶν κλονισθεῖσα,
ὄμμα μελαίνας ἐς κυάνιον ἤλασεν·
δάκρυ δ᾽ ἔθηκε, πυρὸς ὥστε σταγόνα.

ὁ δ᾽ ἀνὴρ ἔλεξεν· «Ῥαδιμάς γάρ εἰμι,
καὶ τεκνώσας λαὸς Ἰσραὴλ μένω.»

ἡ δὲ καλχαῖσα μειδιάσασ᾽ ἔφη·
«ὄλβιε γελῷε, μὴ τρέμου·
Βόβος γ᾽ ἐγώ, καὶ πρὸς κῶμον βαίνω
παιγνίων ἕνεκ᾽ ἐσθῆτος ἀπάτης.»

Notes on the Greek 
  • Ζεῦ, σκοτία νύξ — a very Aeschylean invocation, reminiscent of Agamemnon’s cosmic openings.
  • κλισιάδος λῆμα — “the will of the one in the carriage,” using Homeric klisiás repurposed for our cabman.
  • ὄμμα μελαίνας ἐς κυάνιον ἤλασεν — “his dark eye turned to blue,” a poetic rendering of the cabman’s emotional collapse.
  • Ῥαδιμάς — a playful pseudo‑Semitic name formed like Radamanthys, but with a wink.
  • Βόβος — our beloved Bob, Hellenised.
  • πρὸς κῶμον βαίνω — “I go to a revel,” i.e., a costume party, but in proper tragic diction.
  • ἐσθῆτος ἀπάτης — “garb of deception,” a perfect tragic euphemism for a nun’s costume.

Beyond Europe

Even more astonishing is a Japanese manuscript: a series of haiku in flowing grass script, accompanied by an ukiyo-e-style illustration of a rickshaw driver and a nun beneath cherry blossoms. The final haiku—“Do not laugh / I am a monk / At a costume feast”—compresses the entire narrative into seventeen syllables of Zen mischief.

A cycle of four Edo period haikus presents the tale as follows:

1. 黒衣の影 誓いは風に乗り 夜道ひとり
Kuroi no kage / Chikai wa kaze ni nori / Yomichi hitori
(A shadow in black / vows ride upon the night wind / alone on the path)

2. 揺れる車 唇の火の雨 涙の月
Yureru kuruma / Kuchibiru no hi no ame / Namida no tsuki
(Swaying carriage / lips rain fire / moon of tears)

3. 「妻あり、ユダヤ」 男の声震え 星沈みぬ
“Tsuma ari, Yudaya” / Otoko no koe furue / Hoshi shizuminu
(“I have a wife, and am Jew” / his voice trembles / stars sink low)

4. 笑う修道 「私は僧なりき 仮装の宴」
Warau shūdō / Watashi wa sō nariki / Kasō no utage
(Laughing nun replies / “I am but a monk disguised / to a masquerade”)

The Tale Known as Indaba KaBob NoMshayeli Wetekisi

It is a well‑established fact in the history of southern African linguistics that the Zulu people did not traditionally employ a written script of their own. This changed decisively in the mid‑19th century, when Norbertus Wendelinus (Norbert) Gerlach, a Norwegian missionary, working in collaboration with Bishop John William Colenso, introduced a Latin‑based orthography for isiZulu in the 1850s and 1860s. Their efforts, initially intended for Biblical translation and catechetical instruction, had the unintended consequence of opening the floodgates of Zulu oral tradition to written preservation.

Once the Zulu were furnished with this new alphabetic technology, they began—slowly at first, and then with remarkable enthusiasm—to commit to paper those narratives that had circulated for generations around homestead fires, in cattle enclosures, and along the well‑worn paths of the uMkhomazi valley. Among the earliest of these written records is a tale of such antiquity, such cultural weight, that its appearance in written form was greeted by elders with the solemn nod reserved for ancestral truths.

This story, known among the isiZulu as one of the oldest and most revered in their cultural memory, is said to have been told “kusukela kudala kakhulu”—since time immemorial. It was whispered by hunters beneath the stars, recited by grandmothers stirring porridge at dawn, and laughed over by young warriors polishing their assegai. And when the new Latin letters finally allowed it to be fixed upon the page, the tale emerged in a form both familiar and startlingly fresh.

It is the story now known to scholars as Indaba KaBob NoMshayeli Wetekisi—The Tale of Bob and the Taxi Driver—a narrative whose themes of disguise, confession, and comic revelation appear to transcend geography, language, and epoch. That such a tale should be counted among the foundational myths of the Zulu people is a testament not only to its narrative resilience but also to the universal human delight in stories where identity slips, masks fall, and laughter restores the balance of the world.

The IsiZulu language version recorded in 1858 but millennia older in fact is as follows:

Indaba KaBob NoMshayeli Wetekisi

(The Tale of Bob and the Taxi Driver)

Kuthiwa ngelinye ilanga, umshayeli wetekisi wabona into angakaze ayibone: kuyangena usisi ogqoke izingubo zesonto, emnyama emhlophe, ethule njengomthandazo.

Umshayeli wathi enhliziyweni yakhe: “Hawu, ngabe ngingacela okuncane nje, okungelona icala?”

Wabheka emuva wathi: “Usisi, bengihlala ngifisa ukukwanga owesifazane ongumuntu kaNkulunkulu.”

Lowo “sisi” wambuza: “Ushadile na?” Umshayeli wathi: “Cha, angishadile.” “UyiKatolika na?” Wathi: “Yebo, ngiyakholelwa.”

Bathi sebefikile emgwaqweni ongaboni muntu, lowo “sisi” wamanga umshayeli ngendlela eyenza izinyembezi ziqhamuke emehlweni akhe njengemvula yasehlobo.

Wathi esehogela: “Ngiyaxolisa! Ngikufihlile iqiniso. Ngishadile… futhi ngingumJuda!”

Lowo “sisi” wahleka wathi: “Hhayi bo, ungakhathazeki. Angisiye usisi mina. NginguBob — futhi ngiya emcimbini wamagqokisamoshayo!”

The English Rendition, believed to have been made by Bishop John William Colenso, is as follows:

It is said that on one day, the driver of a taxi saw something he had never seen: there enters a sister (nun) wearing church clothes, black and white, quiet like a prayer.

The driver said in his heart: “Wow, could I perhaps ask for something small, something that is not a crime?”

He looked back and said: “Sister, I have always wished to kiss a woman who is a person of God.”

That “sister” asked him: “Are you married?” The driver said: “No, I am not married.” “Are you a Catholic?” He said: “Yes, I believe.”

They say when they had arrived at a road where no person could be seen, that “sister” kissed the driver in a way that made tears appear in his eyes like summer rain.

He said while sobbing: “I am sorry! I have hidden the truth from you. I am married… and also I am a Jew!”

That “sister” laughed and said: “Oh no, do not worry. I am not a sister. I am Bob — and I am going to a costume party!”

However, it is in an Egyptian papyrus that the historical trail finally dies down. Rendered in hieroglyphs, it depicts a chariot scene with a veiled figure and a scribe observing. The symbols—ankh, owl, papyrus—suggest themes of life, wisdom, and disguise. The caption, if one were to invent it, might read: “He who kisses the veiled one learns his own name anew.”  This is also a contender for the title of oldest Jewish joke in the world.

Conclusion

What seemed to be at the outset a most modern joke, reveals itself as a travelling story spanning centuries, even millennia, and continents, and appears to be as old as humanity itself: a comic engine built from three simple cogs—false sanctity, erotic negotiation, and double unmasking. Each culture dresses the tale in its own garb: nun’s habit, monk’s robe, rickshaw, cab, chariot. The joke behaves like its characters: forever in disguise, forever being unmasked, and forever ready to don a new costume in the next language, the next city, the next age.

The illustrations—Shakespearean Folio, Chaucerian and Petrarchan manuscripts, Hungarian tome, Czech cartoon, Aeschylean papyrus, Japanese scroll, and Egyptian hieroglyphic scene—form a gallery of these costumes. The joke walks through them all, smiling, adjusting its veil, and proving beyond doubt the old maxim that “the old ones are the best”.

Greenlights
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