Original YT playout date: 30 January 2010
Duration: 25:22

“Twas the week before Christmas, and all round the town
Uncle Davey found things that were making him frown
The carp were all stuffed in a tank full of piss
Thinking “even the frying pan’s better than this”
With soap suds and fungus – a piteous sight!
(But I show the way to keep catfish aright)
With incomplete sets and confusing intentions
The products for children’s gifts needed a mention
Just one dwarf per set, while the picture showed seven
May these toy makers get their reward in heaven!
No Happy, No Sneezy, Ach, Donner und Blitzen
Das ganze Ding war nur ein Krock von Schitzen
Thought up by some in-Doc-trinated numpty
To catch out the Dopey, but make the rest Grumpy!
Just boxes of cons were the toys on store shelves
While the queues for a tire change were tiring themselves
With temperatures minus fourteen, and the rest
You wouldn’t want to be out improperly dressed.
Fine folk of goodwill bearing Dortmund plates
Parked up for a while in the invalid space
No badge they did show, and the mother jumped out
Like a sprite, disability strongly in doubt
So they got named and shamed and blamed and inflamed
But let us just pray that they do not get lamed.
For the real needy not one ounce of consideration
But no balls to get out and make confrontation!
But I heard her exclaim as I strolled out of sight
“You can’t film me, man, for I know my rights.”
Continue reading “Love and Grumpiness, or, the Pre-Christmas Spirit – with fine poem wot I wrote.” →