“Twenty years of silence
Were bottled up inside her
She wasn’t holding nothing back
The media got it all
When Charlotte left the press room
Not a Johnsonite was standing
She said “This one’s for Brexit!”
As she watched the last one fall.”
Category: Poems by me
Every political interference in human affairs has undesired side-effects. (Poem)
Employees are given a lot of rights, so employers are scared to employ and try their best to stick to subbies.
Wives come out of divorces with all the assets and all the custody rights, and then the next generation can’t get hubbies.
The Government pushes diet advice like healthy whole grains then wonders why there are more and more tubbies.
We need less political correctness, rather to remember basic good manners, and what brotherly, and sisterly, and for that matter sexual love is.
Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban (Full-Cast Edition)
$27.55 (as of 16/05/2026 00:33 GMT +02:00 - More infoProduct prices and availability are accurate as of the date/time indicated and are subject to change. Any price and availability information displayed on [relevant Amazon Site(s), as applicable] at the time of purchase will apply to the purchase of this product.)The Dungeon Anarchist's Cookbook: Dungeon Crawler Carl, Book 3
$21.99 (as of 16/05/2026 00:33 GMT +02:00 - More infoProduct prices and availability are accurate as of the date/time indicated and are subject to change. Any price and availability information displayed on [relevant Amazon Site(s), as applicable] at the time of purchase will apply to the purchase of this product.)From “Mariam El-Bobini”, the new Disney Musical about an ISIS bride who flew in by means of a magic burqa.

Super Caliphatalistic Fragile Ego Lupus
All these women went off freely now they want to dupe us
If they say it loud enough the media’ll join their stupors
Super Caliphatalistic Fragile Ego Lupus
Umm diddle iddle iddle um diddle ISIS
Umm diddle iddle iddle um diddle ISIS
They travelled half way round the world, and everywhere they went
They got seduced by terrorists in a desert tent
They got to watch beheadings and girls sent to slavery
While they had tasty kebabs and a lovely cuppa tea – whooh!
Super Caliph etc.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Sham Shamima Sham Shamima Sham Sham Sherie,
I think myself lucky you’re not my mummy
Sham Shamima Sham Shamima Sham Sham Sheroo
Good luck will rub off when they prosecute you.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
And a tankful of NATO makes the ISIS fall down
ISIS fall down, the ISIS fall down
Yes a tankful of NATO makes the ISIS fall down
In a most delightful way.
Baghdadi feathering his nest had very little time for rest
While dodging missiles aimed right at his lair
And every task he undertook, inspired by that book
Became undone, as we all had our fun,
for a
Tankful of NATO makes the ISIS fall down
The ISIS fall down, yes the ISIS fall down
Yes a tankful of NATO makes the ISIS fall down
In a most delightful way.
Would anyone like to suggest further re-edited Mary Poppins lyrics to suit the Shamima Begum case? Your poetic efforts welcomed in the comments below. Or maybe suggestions on how to adapt the screenplay of Mary Poppins to suit the ISIS Brides situation. Instead of the Suffragettes campaigning for women’s votes as in the original, there could be a campaign by woman demanding not to be allowed to vote. Instead of a run on the bank, maybe something to do with the price of Brent Crude? Your creative ideas, please!
The Deal
$21.83 (as of 16/05/2026 00:33 GMT +02:00 - More infoProduct prices and availability are accurate as of the date/time indicated and are subject to change. Any price and availability information displayed on [relevant Amazon Site(s), as applicable] at the time of purchase will apply to the purchase of this product.)Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince (Full-Cast Edition)
$41.34 (as of 16/05/2026 00:33 GMT +02:00 - More infoProduct prices and availability are accurate as of the date/time indicated and are subject to change. Any price and availability information displayed on [relevant Amazon Site(s), as applicable] at the time of purchase will apply to the purchase of this product.)Odes of Odium
1. Ode to Nancy Pelosi
Drain drain drain
This cold gray swamp
Let them feel the pain
Administered by Trump
Make it clean again
With that drainage pump.
Nancy, Nancy, Nancy,
Don’t think we are nosey
But your tastes look too fancy
We are not so dozy
As to give public finances
For private costs of Pelosi…
2. Ode to Diane Abbott:
O come, thou Bob Mugabe, come
To England’s humble shores
And take thine erring sister home
Back to yours.
Sir Simon Schama tried to shame her
Party for its views
But they carry on to blame the
Schoah on the Jews.
Abbott takes enormous fees
When telling students “hello”
Her comedy begs the question, “Please,
Abbott, where’s Costello?”
She has a great command of figures
A la Dr Evil
And all the population sniggers
Although I doubt that she will.
So Bob, please come and get her
Before she does more harm
And you in charge can set her
Of some stolen farm.
3. Ode to David Lammy
The enemy within.
It’s not his skin
At fault you’ll find
It’s just his mind.
More odes of odium and prose of opprobrium to come.
The Correspondent: A Novel
$17.33 (as of 16/05/2026 00:33 GMT +02:00 - More infoProduct prices and availability are accurate as of the date/time indicated and are subject to change. Any price and availability information displayed on [relevant Amazon Site(s), as applicable] at the time of purchase will apply to the purchase of this product.)Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone (Full-Cast Edition)
$27.55 (as of 16/05/2026 00:33 GMT +02:00 - More infoProduct prices and availability are accurate as of the date/time indicated and are subject to change. Any price and availability information displayed on [relevant Amazon Site(s), as applicable] at the time of purchase will apply to the purchase of this product.)Poem on the whole history of human language
I recently expanded my earlier metrical version of the Genesis account of Babel to include some further points on the history of language from that point onwards and beyond the veil of Eternity. Hope you enjoy this and find it edifying.
1.
The earth had once one speech o’erall. One tongue men used, to tell
From th’East to Shinar’s plain they came and settled there, to dwell.
Among themselves did they conspire “Bricks let us make,” said they
“To building stones them throughly burn and slime for morter lay.”
“Go to,” said they, “a city great, a tow’r to reach the sky,
We shall construct unto ourselves, our name to magnify
Lest scattered far abroad we be the whole earth’s face around”
They built the walls from bricks they’d baked and slime from lime they’d found.
2.
The Lord looked down at Adam’s kin and saw their undertaking
He knew that left alone this would become mankind’s unmaking
Although still in his infancy, not yet a million souls
Mankind was learning things with which he’d score fatal own goals
Adamic language and long life allowed the human mind
To know and build technologies while immature and blind
The Lord said “See, this people is by language unified
Now can no thing their power restrain their will to realise”
3.
“Now let Us unto them descend, their language to confound
That each the other’s speech and tongue no more may understand.”
And so the LORD did scatter them all o’er the earth from thence.
Their city no more could they build. Its name is Babel hence:
That there the LORD in mighty pow’r the earth’s speech did confound,
And He from thence did scatter them the whole earth’s face around.
For here the Lord unto each soul his single language giving
Ensured that man’s wish was to be with but close kindred living
4.
And so each man his nearest took and from the crowd did flee
They lived alone until they spoke one tongue per family
The mother taught the babies hers, the father also learned it
The elder siblings got to add some features if they earned it
And families at length combined by dint of need to wed
So tribal languages emerged as Babel’s tongues went dead
And tribe fought tribe, and strong tribes grew, their tribal tongue promoting:
The structure ever simpler, the word-stock ever growing
5.
And as they filled the earth and crossed each hill and vale and river,
Some tribes grew great and in due course their languages did sever
Through ice and fire and flood and marsh men walked and faced all dangers
To use all space this world allowed and grow to outnumber angels
And language families emerged that had one time been one
But once again they could no more grasp one another’s tongue.
One tribe, the seed of Abraham, in whom all would be blest
Got history and prophesy to cherish for the rest.
6.
But man since Babel always sought to get back there again
To build the city, raise the tower and make himself a name.
To make the countries all one state and into Unions bind
And place a ruler over all, as blind will lead the blind
Each man who tasted power’s rush soon hatched the grand ambition
To subjugate all men to himself as slaves to his volition.
But rulership of this world here is but for its Creator.
It is reserved for God the Christ and He shall take it later.
7.
For only Christ makes all things good: he’ll teach us what was missing
And speak to us in tongues of men, while angels throng to listen.
And when the Resurrection comes and all things be made new,
That ancient tongue shall sound again, the one that Adam knew.
The lives of men became too short to learn that perfect tongue
But it will be a joy to learn for the forever-young.
And so when we are healed in heart, bodies and minds restored
Again we’ll learn that language giv’n to Adam by the Lord.